


Low Rent Whore

by KatrionasRollins



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Aftermath of Violence, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Injury, F/F, Flashbacks, Gay Bar, Hate Crimes, Head Injury, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Lesbian Character, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Past Rape/Non-con, Post Episode: s21e20 The Things We Have To Lose, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape Aftermath, Sexual Violence, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:00:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23859460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KatrionasRollins/pseuds/KatrionasRollins
Summary: When she's assaulted one warm night, one of SVU's own must face her past and sexuality to confront her attacker.
Relationships: Amanda Rollins/Katriona "Kat" Azar Tamin, Amanda Rollins/Odafin "Fin" Tutuola, Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr. & Katriona "Kat" Azar Tamin, Olivia Benson/Amanda Rollins, Olivia Benson/Odafin "Fin" Tutuola
Comments: 2
Kudos: 29





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own Law and Order SVU nor do I claim to this is purely for fun and to torment myself because apparently my mind wouldn't let this idea leave until I wrote it down. 
> 
> This story can also be found on my Wattpad (@KatrionasRollins) 
> 
> This story will have graphic Heavy/Mature elements so please read at your own risk. 
> 
> Please let me know what you think, every comment and constructive criticism helps me write better. I appreciate it so much. I do apologise for how short these first few chapters might be, they will get longer and more detailed just go easy on me.

"Where's Kat? She's never late" 

Second Grade Detective, Amanda Rollins had to admit that she'd grown rather attached to the youngest member of their squad.. and the first to admit that she was more punctual than Amanda had ever been. 

Her partner, Odafin Tutuola was on the phone and he held a finger up to indicate that he'd answer her as soon as he was done there. It was about that same time that their Captain emerged from her office, eyes searching the squad room for Kat as well. 

"Bad news.. Club rape last night, hate crime" 

Benson sighed, running her hands through her dark waves, she nodded toward her two detectives. 

"You two go check it out.. I'll try Kat" 

No Inhibitions   
391 West 52nd Street  
Saturday, April 25th

"Janitor found her this morning, discarded like the morning trash. It's disgusting"

Rollins and Fin exchanged a look. 

"How did no one see her last night?" 

Her partner's no nonsense, straight to the point tone caused the blonde to gently swat him on the shoulder and offer him a scolding look. He gave her the side eye in return. 

"It's pretty dark out here and we don't usually take our trash out until morning.. we didn't want to move her, she looked pretty hurt. Her um- her underwear were gone and her dress was hiked up. We figured we ought to call you guys"

The manager led the two detectives down an alleyway, kicking some bags of trash out of their way as he did so. The woman's feet were the first thing to come into view, one shoe on one shoe gone. She was lying unconscious on another black garbage bag, hair mostly shielding her bruised and bloodied face. 

"My god.. is that?" 

Fin looked to his partner, not believing what his eyes were showing him.

"Kat.."

Amanda said softly, confirming what Fin did not say. She knelt, searching the rookies neck for a pulse. She looked up at Fin, nodding. 

"She's alive, call a bus" 

Mercy General Hospital   
365 West 32nd Street  
Saturday, April 25th

"Fin, Rollins! What happened?"

Benson's footfalls were light but the tone of her voice was dripping with concern, she stopped in front of a pissed off Fin and Amanda who was currently pacing the floor of the lobby. Both seemed agitated and Olivia couldn't blame them, not after what they'd witnessed. It was always harder when it was someone close to them.. Always. 

"She was unconscious when we got there, she was beaten pretty bad. There was a lot of blood loss, she may be out for a bit" 

The Captain cursed under her breath following her detective's words, she too now paced the floor. 

"You're both making me dizzy.."

Both women shot him a glance but neither said a word, his anger was not directed toward them. After a minute Liv stopped, turning to Fin. He straightened up in response to her nonverbal cue. 

"Fin, lets go back to the club.. see what we can find. Rollins, stay here. If she wakes up, I want the first face she see's to be someone familiar" 

"Copy that, Captain" 

Amanda was already on her way back to Kat's hospital room, Fin followed behind Benson on the way outside. He didn't speak and Liv knew why, he had every right to be angry. No matter how many cases they'd worked nothing ever prepared them for one of their own to fall victim. Liv herself was mad too, mad that in today's day and age crimes of this nature still existed. No words were exchanged between Captain and Sergeant but both had an understanding, find the bastard who did this. Seat belts were hardly buckled before the car flew down the road, a clear goal in the minds of both the Captain and her oldest companion. 

No Inhibitions   
391 West 52nd Street 

"Anything specific I can get for you, folks?" 

Benson turned, Fin flashed his badge. They both offered a friendly smile despite the emotion running through both their veins. 

"You see this girl in here last night? Say about ten thirty, eleven o'clock?"

The bartender frowned, shaking his head but he eyed the picture regardless. 

"Didn't see anyone in here last night, Friday's my day off.. But, Patrica should be able to help you"

He gestured toward a younger looking bartender polishing the counter top, they nodded and thanked him before approaching her. 

"Patricia?" 

The strawberry blonde looked up, somewhat startled by the sudden utterance of her name. She relaxed when she saw they were cops. Benson for sure took notice of the unease, understanding it enough herself to recognize it. Patricia dried her hands on a dish towel, addressing them when she turned back around. 

"How can I help you officers?" 

"Patricia.. did you happen to see this woman in here last night?"

Benson showed her the image this time, taking a gentler approach than Fin had with Patricia's coworker, they were different sides of the same coin. They worked well together because they understood one another but they were so different at times. Patricia seemed to think, squinting at the picture for some time as if trying to place her. Suddenly her eyes lit up, nodding and pointing somewhere behind the cops. 

"She was getting real friendly with a lady toward the dance floor, she seemed happy. I liked to watch her, catch her eye from time to time. She had a magnetic smile.. she disappeared about a half hour later.. say about eleven fifteen. No idea where she went but I didn't see her leave.. I did see her talking to a guy about five minutes before though I didn't see much of what he looked like, it gets pretty crazy in here.. I'm sorry I can't be of more help" 

"That helps a lot, thank you Patricia.." 

Benson sighed, leaning off the counter with Fin in tow. He looked to her just as she started speaking, her detective brain already putting pieces together. Fin had known her long enough to know not to interrupt her while she was in detective mode. 

"Okay.. so we know she was here.. we know she never left. But what the hell was she doing here?"

Hospital Room of Katriona Azar Tamin  
Mercy General Hospital 

Amanda Rollins had been sitting here for fifteen minutes now, gently stroking Kat Tamin's jet black hair. In all honesty it was more to soothe her own nerves than Kat's.. Her hand came away from the younger's forehead when she noticed her eyes flutter open, still mostly out of it but at least she was awake. Those eyes then found the face of the blonde, the woman she had one of the weirdest relationships with.. were they friends or not? Kat could never tell. 

"R-Rollins? What the?" 

She went to move but found that her body protested, head spinning. She didn't object to Amanda pushing her back down, not that she could anyway. 

"You have a slight concussion, you lost a lot of blood honey.. I was worried you wouldn't wake up" 

Amanda's words were strange mostly because they were directed toward her, Kat would have asked about it in any other circumstance. A hand shot up to touch her head, the bump to the back of her head hurt to the touch. Her lip was split and she looked like a mess, a gash to the side of her head had since stopped bleeding but it hurt like hell. Kat moved around, trying to pick a position that would hurt slightly less, her bare thighs rubbing together. She could feel the blood that had dried to the flesh, it didn't ease her mind. Nor did the fact that she was bare under her dress. 

"W-Where's my underwear?" 

The elder female winced, watching the newbie struggle to come to terms with what she had to know deep down was killing her. She swallowed the disgust that followed Kat's question. 

"We don't know, sweetheart. They weren't with you.." 

Kat's eyes closed tightly, trying to wrap her head around what the hell had happened to her. Was it possible she had been?- No.. No there was no way.. she probably just got a little too drunk. Yeah! That was it, she'd gotten drunk and did something dumb, that's all. 

"No. No, I need to get out of here.. I was drunk, I remember that" 

"Alcohol levels were low.. you weren't drunk. Kat you-"

Officer Tamin wanted no part in this, no part in it at all. She grabbed the wires attached to her and tried to yank them out of her, it was clear she was agitated.. refusing to listen to this. She was fine, nothing happened. Amanda's hand overlapped Kat's, stopping her gently and shaking her head. Amanda knew better than most that Kat needed this and she watched as Kat's head fell into her hands. 

"Oh God.. I was raped?" 

Amanda sighed sadly, tears in those oceanic hues as she nodded solemnly. 

"Yes" 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Kat goes through the motions at the hospital, the rest of the squad needs to move forward with the investigation.. Hadid gets on Benson's last nerves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is really short.. I've been busy but really wanted to get something out. Still I really like that Lakria makes an appearance here.. I wonder who called her.

"How could I have let this happen? I'm stronger than this.."

A shaking hand ran through dark tresses as the figure on the bed fought to come to terms with this new reality. Her boss had since traded places with the blonde detective who had broken the news. 

"None of this was your fault, Kat.. you were drugged, that's why you felt drunk. You were in no position to fight back, not with how much was in your system."

Black waves shook with her head, the hair that was normally in a ponytail now cascaded, dishelved, down her back. Blood matted parts of it and it smelled less than pleasent, the morning trash having done a number on the locks. The Captain reached to take the rookie's hand but Kat wanted none of it, she shook her head and pulled her hand away from her side instead placing it on her lap. 

"N-No I- I had it with me all night, I never let it out of my sight.. I know better."

Kat's mind was working overtime, her words were jumbled as her fractured mind tried to figure out what had transpired. 

"Oh my God.. The bartender! It had to have been" 

Dark eyes found those of her boss, holding their gaze. Before she could get another word out there or the elder could counter with her own words, a knock to the doorframe caused both to turn. A nurse stood there beside another woman, she held a clipboard and gestured to the woman beside her. Katriona smiled.

"Lakira" 

"We're ready for you now but your friend here was very persistent."

Newbie flinched, her head whipping back around to face Olivia who's eyes held an unspoken apology. 

"I've gotta get back" 

It was Lakira who stopped her, wrapping her hand around the Captain's wrist and locking eyes with her. 

"Find the bastard who did this to her.. Promise me."

"I will. You have my word" 

Office of Bureau Chief Vanessa Hadid

1 Hogan Place

Saturday, April 25th

"And your Officer? She's credible?"

Every head in the room turned toward Hadid so quick they surely had collective whiplash. The fuck kinda question was that? 

"She was found passed out on a trash bag. Alcohol levels were low, she was sufficiently drugged up. Of course she's credible, she's one of us!" 

Amanda placed her hand to her partners shoulder, the Atlanta in her telling her to bite her tongue before she too let Hadid have it. 

"She's only been with SVU for a short while.. She was out late, flirting, perhaps it got a little rough" 

The detective turned Captain could no longer listen to this, she stood up. Getting up close and personal with the woman who had the nerve to say she was fighting for the victims. 

"She was unconscious. Beaten to a bloody pulp, her underwear were missing! We don't blame the victim here, ever!" 

Blazing eyes turned on Carisi next, that same tone came down on the ex-detective hard. 

"Carisi, either you're one of us or you're one of them! One of my own's been raped and I will find whoever did this with or without you!" 

It wasn't like her to lose her temper but with Kat somehow it felt personal, more personal maybe then even Amanda's had been.. Perhaps it was because the newbie was so young, so hopeful. Regardless, Benson stormed out with Fin not far behind. This left Amanda with Hadid and Carisi, both looked to her expectantly. 

"If you want me to say they're wrong I can't.. The Sonny I know would fight tooth and nail for Kat.. You'd do it for me" 

Then she too was gone though even as she left she could hear the start of a long argument. Good. Stick it to the woman, Carisi. 

Finding her squad, as small as it may be, Amanda exhaled sharply and yanked her phone out of her pocket. 

"It's Lakira.. Kat just finished with the rape kit, couldn't have been easy" 

Elder brunette immediately took charge, nodding toward the blonde. This nonverbal cue the southern woman knew well and she took off without a word. As for Captain and Sergeant they had other matters to attend to. 

Hospital Room of Katriona Azar Tamin

Mercy General Hospital

"You've looked better Kit-Kat" 

Kat winced, the cool towel that Lakira was dabbing on the gash to the side of her head was slightly bloody. Lakira was gentle, her voice soothing. 

"They'll have to ask questions baby.. Nothing will be hidden after this.. Let them do their job, don't make the mistake I made. Don't let this bastard get away with it. Promise me, Kat" 

The officer gently laced her fingers with Lakira's, eyes finding hers. 

"Still thinking about Dakota?" 

"Everyday, Kit-Kat. Everyday." 

Lakira nodded just as a figure entered the threshold, Amanda Rollins frowned hating that she'd interrupted. 

"Can I take a statement?" 

Kat straightened, she should have known that was why Amanda was there this time. She glanced to her friend, staring down at their intertwined hands. The southern female felt a pang of sympathy shoot through her heart, goddamn this hurt. 

"She can stay.. If it makes you more comfortable" 

Katriona nodded, it would make her feel more comfortable but she didn't want Lakira to hear this if she wasn't ready.. Not wanting to trigger her friend. 

"Lakira.. Don't- if you need to go-" 

"I'm here. You were there for me." 

Blonde flipped her notebook open, clicking her pen and holding it above the paper in a 'ready to write' position.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A possible lead from a fellow Projects Kid. Two women with shared trauma and a Captain that refuses to give up.
> 
> This went up WAY WAY WAY later than I planned oh my god. I am so sorry about the long wait, the writers block and complete lack of motivation to write this chapter totally sucked. I have newfound inspiration now so the next chapter is already in the works for you. Again, I apologize deeply and I hope you like it.

Her head was pounding, even the ticking of the clock seemed to aggravate her headache. She'd taken pills upon pills, one to prevent pregnancy, others to combat various diseases and others still to lessen the pain. She had thought it would never end. Headstrong as she was, Katriona had never felt so worthless in her life.. and that was coming from someone who grew up in the Projects. It took a moment for Amanda's next question to register, 'What were you doing last night?' 

"We were flirting.. She pulled me on the dance floor, we danced, I bought her a drink and we called it a night. Redhead, I think.. I-I really don't remember much about the man Amanda.. It's all a little blurry, I'm sorry."

She'd been sitting here for fifteen minutes, uncomfortably so, trying (and failing) to remember anything about the night prior. So far all she could get were glimpses of the woman's face. She'd been pretty, average height with soft red hair. Her smile was what Kat kept seeing, that damn smile. According to Olivia, the man she'd been seen with the previous night had been talking to her and poor Kat was really trying to piece that conversation together in her mind.. nothing. Katriona had one best friend in this world and she was right beside her holding her hand.

"That's alright.. your memory will come back in pieces and that's normal. Can you tell me anything about the place? Was it busy?" 

"Very.. not unusual honestly. It's really hard to find LGBT bars around so we all tend to flock to NI" 

NI being the nickname the locals had given the place, that much Amanda could gather on her own. 

"Alright. What about the people? Did anyone seem-" 

"Look, Amanda! I-I can't remember alright?! I wasn't paying attention to anyone but her. I give my full attention when I'm interested in someone, I'm sorry!" 

Amanda normally would take offense to being spoken to in such a hostile manner but then wasn't the defensive nature that Kat displayed the same one she'd given off when she came to New York eight years ago after Patton raped her? She felt it and she sympathized with it, though even as she said these next words she didn't fully believe she could make them happen.

"I'm sorry.. we don't have to do this now. I'm sure you're tired and just want to go home. I'll get the nurse." 

Amanda's comment was innocent enough but one look at Kat and Lakira sensed something off, she glanced at Kat just as she spoke. 

"Oh god.. home." 

Baynard Rustin Houses  
Gowanus, Brooklyn  
Saturday, April 25th

"Katriona? Yeah, she's usually good about coming home on time. Sometimes we sit on the steps and wait for her, she's always got snacks or a story. She never showed last night.. Is-Is she okay?" 

The girl couldn't have been more than seventeen, it was clear that Kat was the backbone of this part of the Projects. It was clear that she was loved around here. This was her territory, her home. 

"She's hurt.. and the best way you can help her right now is to think of anyone who would want to hurt her." 

Captain Benson forced herself to swallow the disgust that immediately followed her words, thinking of Kat that way hurt.

"She's the big sister around here, had the opportunity and the means to leave but never did. She stuck around for us.. I don't know of anyone in the world who would want to hurt her" 

The other girls echoed her statement, none seemed to know of anyone who'd target Kat. Except.. 

"There was a man down that way."

Another girl, older in age about nineteen to the previous ones seventeen, pointed toward the chain link fence. Olivia glanced toward it.

"Couldn't see his face but he seemed to be watching Katriona.. when she left he took off too."

"Did you see which way he went?"

It was Fin who asked this and he watched as she nodded and pointed down the road, gesturing to the turn on the end of the block. His boss followed the girl's gaze.

"Down that way, when she took the left so did he. Disappeared after that."

The teen shrugged, catching the basketball that had been thrown her way. Her friends waited for her by the hoop. Olivia dug a business card from her pocket, handing it to the nineteen year old who'd been a bigger help than she realized.

"If you remember anything, let me know. You've been very helpful."

Pocketing the card she turned and ran off, Fin watched her shoot the hoop effortlessly. He smiled slightly, remembering his own time growing up in the Projects and followed behind his boss on the way back to their car. Olivia started the ignition but did not pull out of the driveway, her eyes on her phone. The Sergeant watched her shoot a text before placing her phone in the center console. 

"They're discharging her." 

Liv automatically filled her partner in on the latest, she saw his eyebrows crinkle in concern and confusion both. She knew exactly what he was thinking. 

"Amanda's letting her crash with her and the girls.. Doctor doesn't want her home alone and we need to be sure she's not targeted again anyway."

Apartment of Detective Amanda Rollins

Saturday, April 25th

"Don't mind the mess, kids you know?"

Amanda Rollins kept a surprisingly level head as she gently moved toys and things out of the way with her foot, guiding Katriona into her seemingly already cramped apartment. 

"I can't stay here.. I can't put you out like that."

Amanda turned, facing Kat and looking at her with eyes that conveyed everything she wished someone had told her eight years ago. No one had saved her but by God she would do her best to help save Kat.

"Hey. No, you're gonna stay here for tonight at least. It's safer until we figure things out. You're ( not ) a burden Kat."

Eyes of the younger turned away, more self conscious than she'd felt in a while. 

"Can I shower?"

She asked, almost sheepish in her voice and words. They came from two separate generations, Kat's worldview was so different than Amanda's. The way she was raised, she was a burden until proven otherwise. She was reckless in her job but only because growing up in the Projects was so different than growing up in Atlanta. They were different but so alike in ways neither knew.

Amanda softened, taking in the woman in front of her. Gone was the brazen, quick to fight, tough young woman she'd met and often detested.. in her place stood a woman that was bent, not broken mind you, by the events of the day and night prior. The blonde nodded, gesturing for Kat to follow her lead.

"Right in here. There's towels in that cabinet and-"

Rookie blinked and Amanda was gone, another instant later and she was back with a pair of jeans and a plain white tee shirt.

"You can wear these until.."

Amanda made a mental note to text Liv and ask about clothing for Kat. She was relieved when Kat nodded, agreeing to this arrangement without argument.

"Thank you."

The youngest placed the clothing on the toilet seat lid, reaching to work the showerhead. This she could figure out on her own. 

"If I'm not here when you get out, I'm with the squad. They're understaffed as it is and-"

Katriona shook her head, she didn't need the explanation. 

The blonde nodded, taking the hint and going to leave.

"Hey."

Amanda turned, the door halfway closed. She eyed the rookie with those piercing blue eyes of hers.

"Did you call Lakira?"

At this, Rollins smiled knowingly. She knew how important Lakria was to Kat and how safe she felt around her. It hadn't even been a question for Lakria either, she'd volunteered to come up herself before Amanda had a chance to ask.

"Thank you."

Blonde locks moved slightly with her nod, the thanks was not needed but appreciated all the same. 

"Go shower. You'll feel better."

The door closed with finality, Kat stepping into the steady stream of water and finally ( finally ) letting herself go. To cry, to scream.. to feel everything and anything that she was feeling. 

If Amanda heard the screaming, she ignored it.. well, no. She didn't ignore it so much as she knew it would do Kat no good if she intervened, she'd been there herself.. it was a painful, traumatizing process but it needed to be done, felt and experienced if Kat ever wanted to heal. Checking in on the daughters she shared this apartment with, Amanda smiled at their sleeping forms before closing their door softly and once more escaping the apartment, locking it for Kat's safety and peace of mind.


	4. Never Get Assaulted On A Friday Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fin worries for Kat, Hadid makes the Squad that much more frustrated and as Kat adjusts to Amanda's apartment and her kids, she makes a case changing realization.

Red feet padded out of the bathroom, their owner toweled at her dark waves as her bare feet kept slipping into the one size too big pair of jeans that her host had so kindly provided to her. Instinctively she turned a doorknob, peeking her head just far enough into the room to check on the two children. 

"Shoot! The babysitter!" 

Katriona quietly closed the door, padding to the living room where she'd left her phone. Sliding it unlocked, Kat stared at the number on the paper in her opposite palm. Another glance toward the door had the woman tossing her phone back down and slipping the paper in her pocket. Glancing around the room something caught her eye, a black case leaned against the far wall somewhat hidden by the arm of the sofa. 

"Hello there.."

She whispered, sliding over on the sofa to grab and unlatch it. The strings had been tuned but not recently, the dust on the case simply confirmed that. Officer Tamin gently lifted the thing, situating it on her lap and strumming softly. 

Office of Captain Olivia Benson   
Saturday April 25th 

"Hey! Sorry, I had to make sure Kat was-"

Captain Benson waved a dismissive hand, she understood without the explanation. She was surrounded by the rest of their understaffed squad, Fin was unusually quiet and Carisi stuck to the back wall without a word himself. 

"Hadid's locked down.. she gave us the go ahead for now but she's-"

"She's afraid Kat cried rape."

Amanda Rollins' eyes met those of her former partner, they shared a single understanding but that didn't mean that she was happy. The hatred she felt for Hadid in that moment was strong, what in the world was the Bureau Chief thinking of their youngest? 

"Pretty much.. she's wary. Kat's new, inexperienced.. out late on a Friday night, she's just trying to cover her bases"

Amanda rolled her eyes but said nothing, it wasn't worth biting Carisi's head off for something he had no say in. It wasn't his fault and they all knew it.. didn't mean they had to be happy about it.

"Okay well, we work with what we got and go from there. Here.. The security camera footage from the bar last night."

Benson flipped the tablet so her squad plus Carisi could see, it was pretty dark but Fin could just make out Tamin's stumbling form being pushed against the brick.

"Okay so, there's Kat. And there's the dumpster you found her near.. He's smart, knows to avoid facing security cameras but just bold enough to keep them both in the line of sight the entire time."

"The bastard wanted her to be filmed.."

Sergeant Tutuola turned from the video, fists balled at his sides as he stormed out. Kat was more than a coworker, she was a little sister. The contents of his desk hit the floor, hands falling atop his head in another second. Eh, whatever.. he'd pick it all up later. His eyes traveled to Kat's empty desk, feeling her absence heavily for the first time that day. She'd sit on that desk with one leg crossed over the other, she radiated GenZ energy despite being a Millennial which was, come to think of it, probably because of the younger kids she'd become a big sister to in her Projects building. She would have caught him staring by now and made some smart-ass remark before looking down and away from him. She would have tossed a pen at him or made some vine reference that just barely pertained to the situation at hand. That was Katriona Azar Tamin in all her glory. Her absence was felt, seeing her like that had nearly killed him and thinking of her in any way that wasn't her strong willed, always-has-a-joke nature was destroying him.

Amanda Rollins' blue hues scanned the area, looking for her first partner.. her first real friend when she first transferred. Those same eyes chose to ignore the things scattered about the floor by his desk in favor of joining him by Tamin's empty desk. 

"Here."

When he looked behind him, a key was dangling from her finger and her lips were stretched into a thin smile when he looked up at her. They shared between them a look they both knew well.

Apartment of Detective Amanda Rollins

"Auntie Kat, will you tell me a story?"

The strumming stopped, black waves shielded her eyes for the fraction of a second before she moved her head to push them away. The child standing to her side had a stuffed bunny in her arms and seemed absolutely terrified. So second nature was her tenderness with kids that Kat dismissed the title of aunt she'd suddenly been given and the fact that the adorable little girl with Amanda's blue eyes and blonde hair apparently knew of her.

"A story? I sure can.. come on up."

She waited until Jesse Rollins had climbed up, wincing slightly when she was too rough on a tender part of her body, before she resumed her strumming. Her voice was gentle, soothing to both the girl and the dog at the Officer's feet.

"There will come a soldier who carries a mighty sword, he will tear your city down oh lei-oh lai-oh Lord. Oh lei, oh lai, oh lei, oh Lord. He will tear your city down, oh lei-oh lai-oh Lord"

Dark brown eyes met light blue ones, those that matched the sky held question and intrigue alike. The whimsical melody of the song often inspired the same gleam in the eyes of the children in Gowanus. 

"There will come a poet whose weapon is his word, he will slay you with his tongue oh lei-oh lai-oh Lord. Oh lei, oh lai, oh lei, oh Lord. He will slay you with his tongue, oh lei-oh lai-oh Lord"

Fingers played the guitar simply by muscle memory, she hadn't played in a while and only when the younger kids in her building asked her to do so. She never could disappoint them. 

"There will come a ruler whose brow is laid in thorn, smeared with oil like David's boy oh lei-oh lai-oh Lord. Oh lei, oh lai, oh lei, oh Lord. Smeared with oil like David's boy oh lei-oh lai-oh Lord. Oh lei, oh lai, oh Lord. He will tear your city down, oh lei-oh lai.. oh!"

Her heart missed a beat, so caught up in what she was doing that neither she nor the girl noticed the figure standing just in the doorway watching them. Her anxiety had spiked despite that fact that she knew just who was standing there. She smiled sheepishly, placing the guitar down by her feet and instead moving her hand to absently run through Jesse's hair as the girl now lay across her lap. The baby monitor was on the coffee table just in reach and Kat had been checking it every so often to make sure the younger of the two kids was still okay and asleep.

He swallowed the pain he felt just then, he'd been so transfixed by the scene that he'd walked into that he hadn't thought about the very real possibility that he'd scare her. 

"I'm sorry.. I didn't want to disturb you. You two seemed so comfortable."

She chuckled, shaking her head and looking to Jesse who smiled at Fin when he waved at her.

"Honey, why don't you go to your room and check on your sister okay?"

"Okay! Thank you, Auntie Kat."

Jesse scrambled off her lap and ran back to her bedroom, oblivious to Katriona's wince of pain when she did so. 

Katriona chuckled, leaning over to grab the case. Her hand met his, looking up to find his eyes. 

"I got it tough guy.. I was raped not shot."

Pulling the case up to her lap and placing the instrument into it. Kat was somewhat unnerved by the tense atmosphere created in the room at the moment. Making remarks like that was how her generation and the generation after her collectively coped with trauma.. GenZ and Millennial's were so alike that oftentimes they were either lumped together into one giant generation, confused for one another or banded together to accomplish a common goal. She loved that.. the way the younger generations could work together and share the same humor in a way that the generations before them really couldn't. But as much as it was a coping mechanism for her and so many others Katriona recognized how it hurt Fin.

She moved aside so as to make room for him beside her, placing the guitar back in the exact spot she'd found it in the same movement and when she turned back she found him beside her.

"Are those for me?"

She asked, referring to the bag of clothing he'd brought with him and grabbing it.

"Thank God! I have been swimming in these pants, Fin.. it is ridiculous."

The Sergeant chuckled at her words, her feet were indeed tucked inside the legs of the pants she wore. Now that she had showered and cleaned herself up, she looked much better than they had found her and it appeared she was feeling a little better now too. 

"Kat-"

Fin stopped himself, what would he even say to her to make this better? There were no words that would take back what had been done here. Nothing that would make this easier. Swallowing hard, he looked away for a second before turning back to her with a question now in his mind.

"What were you doing there?"

Tamin bit her lip, brushing a lock of dark hair behind her ear. Her face flushed a soft scarlet shade. She knew that he already knew what she had been doing there, it was obvious. 

"It's a gay bar, Fin.. I think you know why I was there. Never get assaulted on a Friday night.."

And she did it again.. that dark humor will get ya. She was bisexual with a heavy female lean, so apparent was this lean that sometimes she wondered if she was just a lesbian. Either way, she wasn't ashamed of her sexuality, no matter what orientation she was. Every sexuality and identity was real and valid and she would always stand by and defend that. 

Still she knew what he'd really meant by that question, the question beneath the question if you will.

"Normally I only go out if I'm meeting someone but it was a hard shift, a tough case and I just- I needed a break. I didn't go there with the intention of meeting anyone, I went to take my mind off things for a little.. I only had one drink the entire night, I don't drink much on a normal night. The next thing I know, I'm having a hard time seeing and walking.. she offered to walk me home when some guy stopped her but he did so kind of aggressively I think. I-I don't remember if he spoke or not.. I just remember his eyes. They looked at me with such anger.. I-I think they knew each other, they argued for a bit like they did anyway."

Fin blinked, this was new information that Kat hadn't brought up with Amanda before.. not that he could blame Kat for only just now remembering things, what she'd been through was traumatic on its own not to mention the head trauma. He placed a hand atop hers and only spoke once she met his eyes, a kindness deep within the chocolate hues of the Sergeant. 

"Is there anything else, anything at all, that you remember right now? Even the smallest thing of things can help us."

Officer Tamin took her lip in between her teeth, thinking hard for several seconds before she nodded. Looking to Fin with a sudden realization in her eyes. 

"He had a name tag on, like he worked there."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Author's Note: The dialogue from Kat when she's with Jesse are lyrics from a song called "Solider, Poet, King" by The Oh Hello's. I kept hearing the song while scrolling through TikTok and everytime I heard it I felt it was something Kat would sing to the kids if she ever got to babysit. Go check out the song, it's delightful.]


End file.
